Daddy's tough love
by Bl4ckHunter
Summary: One-shot story. Crack fic. Barry has enough of being unable to control his wife and daughter, so he resolves to an unusual psychological warfare plan.


**Inspired by Czech sitcom **_**Jetelín**._

**Disclaimer: I do not own **_**DC ****Comics **_**or the CW TV shows** _**Arrow**, **The ****Flash**, **Legends ****of ****Tomorrow**, **Supergirl **_**or any other characters or elements pertaining to the mentioned franchises.**

* * *

Nora snuck into the darkened house quietly, phasing through the door before Barry turned on the lights, glaring.

"Dad… do you know what time it…"

"Two o'clock at night. And I had no alert about metahumans or criminals." Barry warned.

"So why aren't you in bed?" Nora asked with a bit of disdain and rebellious tone as she approached the fridge and picked some pancakes.

"Where were you the whole night?" Barry demanded.

"What, you've been waiting the whole night in the dark to catch me?" Nora asked with more than a little disrespect as she drank her juice and Barry clenched his teeth, trying to control his temper.

"Where have you been?" Barry asked.

"On a date." Barry raised his brows as Nora waved her hand. "He was a loser, don't worry. He didn't even have a car, I considered speeding him over to his home."

"I thought you said you'd be home early!" Barry snapped as she was eating a banana.

"Barry, she's a teenager, can't you take it easy on her or at least argue quietly?" Iris pointed out as she went out, half-asleep and yawning.

"I don't have to argue at all. Dad's the one dramatizing it." Nora shrugged.

"Don't talk back at me!" Barry snapped.

"I'm not a six-year old anymore." Nora shrugged again, not caring about Barry's attitude.

"OK, both of you take it easy and besides, she's young, don't you remember enjoying night life?" Iris reminded and Barry glowered.

"The past five years my night life has been…" Barry took a breath, trying to calm down as Nora got up.

"OK, I think it's past my bedtime and I don't need this drama before going to sleep." Nora said before speeding off to her bedroom.

"Nora West-Allen, you and I are not…"

"Dad, I'm tired and I need to sleep but you and Mom can finish whatever business you got going on." Nora smiled before going to bed and Barry looked puzzled and with open mouth before turning to Iris.

"Is there something you want to talk about, Barry?" Iris smiled.

Barry was about to explode but he had no energy to argue late at night. "I'm sleeping over at Cisco's." He sped out from the house.

* * *

The next morning, Barry returned into the house, visibly annoyed as he looked into the fridge. "Hey, where are my pancakes?"

"It was my dinner." Nora quipped.

"Hey!" Barry snapped.

Iris turned to Barry. "Barry, you know speedsters burn a lot of calories…"

"That's why we set some rules here." Barry said. "Unless it is a metahuman emergency, she comes home early for a dinner, so that I don't have to ask Cisco for more energy bars, they're not cheap to make!"

"What, Barry, she's a kid, so of course she has a larger appetite than you and Wally and Jesse combined." Iris said.

Barry rolled his eyes. "You know what, I hope Joe has some leftover pancakes from yesterday." He sped out from apartment as Nora and Iris looked puzzled at what just happened.

"Does he always snap like that?" Nora asked.

"Well, not because of these minor issues." Iris said.

* * *

"What happened to the living room?" Barry snapped as he saw that his geek things, such as Chewbacca's figurine or Millennium Falcon model were gone and it looked more like made for women.

"Barry, we need to rearrange some things." Iris said.

Barry took a breath, trying to calm down before he ordered Nora to talk with him in private in the bedroom. There was some quick yelling, too quick for Iris to understand as she realized that they were arguing in superspeed before a few seconds later, Barry went out, his face red with relentless rage as Nora was behind him, giggling quietly and smile wide from ear to ear.

"What?" Iris asked as Barry took a breath.

"Our. Daughter. Started to bring up embarrassing stuff from my childhood, such as when I accidentally burned Joe's favorite jacket and the living room while testing my experiment on science fair." Barry said slowly with low tone and murderous glare. "You told her?"

Iris and Nora giggled before Barry fumed with rage and took a deep breath, speeding out from the apartment into the desert.

"I hate her! I hate them! I hate our marriage! I hate my own life!"

* * *

_**Star City**_

"Wow." Felicity gapped as she poured a glass of whiskey to Barry, while he visited her and Oliver in their apartment. "You didn't try to fight back?"

"They have the right ammo to shoot me down!" Barry snapped before he drank his booze. "Thanks. Those two teaming up against me is even worse than Thawne, Zoom, Savitar, Cicada and DeVoe teaming up against me. It's like throwing gasoline canister into the fireplace."

"I suggest stoic calm or antidepressants." Felicity said.

"Wait and did you try "forbidden fruit" method?" Oliver asked.

"I think Nora's enjoying forbidden fruit too much." Barry muttered.

"You know, when I was a kid and was going through… _the_ phase…" William spoke up. "I didn't want to eat. So Mom stopped cooking and then I begged her to. She even locked the fridge and I tried to pry it open."

"Or when I was studying too hard onto college and Joe said I was overwhelming myself, so he said I needed to stop studying or my brain would overload." Barry said.

"Yeah, not to be the smart-ass but _you_ were a hungry kid…" Felicity told William before she turned to Barry. "And _you_ are a geek by nature."

"Look, all I'm saying is reverse psychology is a good strategy." William said.

"Yeah but… I doubt it works on teenagers… or adults." Oliver said. "I mean, teenagers care only about their own benefit."

"Yeah, you're right." Suddenly an idea sparked in Barry's mind. "But I could use that. Mix things up a bit. Guys, you are geniuses."

"Yeah but I doubt that will work on Nora, considering her age." William pointed out.

"He's right. I'd just ground her and put a dampening chip on her again." Felicity said.

"I'm not talking about Nora anymore." Barry said, wide smile on his face and devious plan in his mind as deep inside, he was laughing like an evil master planner.

* * *

**_Central City_**

"Dad, where are you going?" Nora asked as Barry was packing his things.

"I have to go to CSI conference in Midway City, I won't be back for three days." Barry said.

"Wait, you're leaving us alone for three days?" Iris said sadly.

"You're adults now, aren't you?" Barry laughed. "You can handle being here on your own, right?"

"Yeah, sure." Iris nodded. "It's gonna be OK."

"And… no parties, no changes in this apartment, _and_ no serious trouble with metahumans." Barry said.

Iris shrugged. "Barry, she's not a…"

"The last two things were for you, _not_ her." Barry said. "And don't call me unless it's a life-or-death emergency." He finished before he left the apartment

* * *

"Didn't Dad say we shouldn't get into serious trouble with metahumans?" Nora asked as there was a fire metahuman attacking in the city before Killer Frost stopped him.

"Look, Nora, I think you should vacuum clean the apartment. I got other work to do." Iris said as she looked at the mess.

"My back will hurt." Nora protested.

Iris pleaded. "I need to finish an article and also, there are two of us, so why won't you…"

"There's no way I'm doing domestic work! I'm not twelve!" Nora protested.

"I will ground you." Iris warned.

"I will kill you." Nora said as they looked at each other with intense glares.

* * *

"_You will do as I say!_" Iris yelled and Cisco, Caitlin and Ralph were outside the apartment, listening to yelling and smashing furniture as they all tensed.

"_You haven't changed at all, you're so dominating bitch!_" Nora shouted.

"_What did you just call me? Nora West-Allen, you take that back right now!_" Iris yelled back as Cisco, Ralph and Caitlin heard glass smashing.

"_I'm not a maid!_" Nora yelled before throwing at Iris a series of dirty profanity words.

"_What the… you've got a mouthful, young lady! I will spank you until your butt is red!_"

"Wow. Where did she even learn these words?" Ralph tensed. "Shouldn't we call Barry?"

"Barry said we should call him in case of life-or-death emergency." Cisco reminded, enjoying the arguing between Iris and Nora.

"He also said that those two could handle being alone and he needed a break from Central City and those two and I don't blame him." Caitlin pointed out.

"True enough." Ralph nodded before they heard what seemed to be glass smashing and electricity crackling and both females screaming in rage as they tensed.

"Wow. Sounds like wrestling match." Caitlin said.

"I hope we won't have to call an ambulance." Cisco said before they heard '_whooshing_' speedster sounds.

"Or time travel." Ralph added before they heard Nora yell another series of dirty words at Iris.

"Whoa!" Caitlin gapped.

"She's got a mouthful." Cisco nodded.

"_Yeaugh! That hurts!_" Nora screamed in pain.

"_When I'm done with you, you'll be begging for something as sweet as pain! Get back here, you little…_" Iris shouted.

"I wonder what is going on…" Cisco was about to vibe as he was about to touch the door before they heard loud slam at the door before they backed off. "On second thought, I don't want to know."

"_OK, you asked for it!_" Nora snapped.

* * *

**_The following morning_**

The apartment was turned upside down, with Iris and Nora having bruised faces and glaring at each other at the breakfast, while the apartment was semi-cleaned up with some furniture still turned around and things smashed and there was shattered glass and porcelain on the floor.

"Hey." Barry smiled before he looked around, obviously faking being shocked at the mess in the apartment. "Whoa, what happened here?"

"Dad." Nora hugged Barry tightly. "Never leave me alone here with her."

"Barry." Iris breathed out. "Promise me that… whatever Nora does… she will discuss this with you because she doesn't listen to me. Please."

"And can you do the same?" Barry asked Iris. "Will you do as I say?"

Iris and Nora looked at each other before turning to Barry, nodding frantically in agreement.

"OK, we will do everything you say."

"I promise. Every single word."

* * *

**_Later, Star City_**

"So, how did it go?" Felicity asked.

"Reverse psychology worked. But although, I had to speed clean the apartment for an hour. Seriously, you don't want to fight with a speedster in your own place." Barry said. "And now, Nora listens to my every order out in the field and Iris, whenever she makes changes in our apartment, she…" A moment later, Barry's phone rang as he picked it up. "Yes, Iris? No, no pink couch, please. Yes. That's good. Thank you. I love you too." He hung up. "I'm the boss now."

He high-fived with Felicity and Oliver, satisfied that he was in charge once again as they all laughed and drank a shot of whiskey and celebrated Barry's victory.

"To Barry being the boss!" Oliver said.

"May the bitches be forever under your thumb!" Felicity said.

* * *

**In the Czech show, it was the mother's sister and daughter against the mother but I thought it was funny.**

**I find it annoying that more than sometimes Iris and Nora at each other's throats and sometimes, they're like perfect Mommy and little girl.**

**So, what do you guys think?**

**Please review and let me know if you have enjoyed this one-shot.**

**With regards**

**_Bl4ckHunter_**


End file.
